Wednesday, August 24, 2005

Dredging up the old corpse to see if it still stinks

If the air, the past day or two, has been redolent with the reek of a Rove, it's not because Uncle Karl has been asking Junior to pull his finger. It's a familiar stench, yes, but far more foul than anything Rove could muster up from the brimstone pit of his colon.

For almost a year after the war, lip-diddlers of all political stripes were heard whistling a trite and simple tune, "If you don't support the war, you don't support the troops, you're giving aid and comfort to the enemy and you support the terrorists." Of course, anyone with a salt shaker-full of brain knew that song and dance was utter hooey but it was catchy and like the Macarena, got the best of normally sensible and nominally intelligent people. Democrats and Republicans alike could be heard reciting the verses verbatim and no matter where you turned, the damned song was being blasted out of some pinhead's piehole.

Eventually, the song got old and as those things go, when it piped up people could be heard muttering, "Uh, could you change the station?" As the war dragged on and it became evident to everyone that the war had nothing to do with terrorism, that the reasons for the war were a web of fabrications and lies not worthy of a three year-old, people began to think that maybe supporting the war had nothing to do with supporting the troops, that maybe, by golly, the troops were better off backing out of a turd hunt so completely botched, so perfectly fiddlefucked, that it could have only been hatched in the tiny minds of an idiot child and his oatmeal-brained buddies.

Not many people wanted to hear it. Whenever it got played (usually in places with a playlist limited to 4 or 5 songs, all of them stale), the vast majority was reminded of how foolish they had been to sing along, flail their hands in the air like zombie minstrels and line-dance to a truly awful and inauthentic melody. An ugly memory, it was best buried and forgotten, like a trove of old pornography.

So here's the stench: someone snuck into the back yard to dig up the stinking corpse and dance it around on a stick like it was suddenly new and alive and minty fresh. Bush dangled it around in Idaho earlier today, telling the handful of people who are still willing to endure his bullshit that, "I think those who advocate immediate withdrawal from not only Iraq but the Middle East are advocating a policy that would weaken the United States."

Rumsfeld took his turn shaking the bag of bones (observers were stymied at times deciding who was who), comparing thos against the war to Stalinists. Having seen the corpse dance around like a klansman at a cross-burning, The American Legion decided it ought to have a turn at letting the long pig dance it up at it's Honolulu convention (what with the luau theme and all).

Having subjected you to this lengthy mixed metaphor, I'll drive a stake in its heart and, unlike the perseverators on the right, give this thing a quick demise. I'll only add that if you want to know who revived the tired tune of "If you don't support the war, you don't support the troops," you need only look as far as Karl Rove. I assume he's banking on the collective short-term memory loss of the American people since the reappearance of the played out song occured today in a big way. Which should announce to all of us that their crew has truly run out of ideas.

Unfortunately, we'll hear this song for the next few weeks because Junior and his tittering nitwits will think they have discovered something really cool.

What they won't expect is that the American public has added a new verse to the tired old song, a reprise actually, from an old song that never gets stale:
"We won't get fooled again!"

Sunday, August 21, 2005

Evidence of spine detected in several recent CNN incidents

In an amazing discovery this past week, scientists and television viewers alike were astounded when small evidence of a spine was exhibited in two separate incidents on CNN.

The first discovery occured on Wolf Blitzer's talking puppet show "The Situation Room" when "resident curmudgeon" Jack Cafferty objected loudly to CNN's gleeful licking of the BTK Killer's balls. Cafferty revealed his spine when he said:
We ought to be ashamed of ourselves. Publicity is this monster's gasoline. It's what kept him going during the years he was playing cat and mouse with the cops and murdering innocent people. He loved being the BTK killer. He loved reading about himself in the newspapers, watching the television stories on the local news in Kansas, on the nights before he got caught.

Doesn't anybody get this? This thing should have been sentenced in a closed courtroom in 30 seconds and thrown into a hole to rot. I'm a little embarrassed to be a part of the media on a day like this.

Later in the day, Bob Costas bowed out from licking the same balls while also refusing to hump the non-existent corpse of Natalie Holloway. Asked to fill in for the Larry King (who was due for his semi-annual re-inflation):
Costas, hired by CNN as an occasional fill-in on "Larry King Live," refused to anchor Thursday's show because it was primarily about the Alabama teenager who went missing in Aruba. Chris Pixley filled in at the last minute.

"I didn't think the subject matter of Thursday's show was the kind of broadcast I should be doing," Costas said in a statement. "I suggested some alternatives but the producers preferred the topics they had chosen. I was fine with that, and respectfully declined to participate."

In the meantime, media experts are baffled how any amount of spine might have infiltrated the newsrooms at CNN. Some experts are speculating that CNN chief Jon Klein has devoured so many brains and hearts that the emergence of spine may have emerged from under "tons of fat".

Saturday, August 20, 2005


Although I'm not particularly enamoured with the "politics of the center" (especially as it's described by some Democrats), there is something to be said for its potency. For better or worse, it's how most Americans vote.

"Blowback" is a phenomenon that is not unique to American politics but is certainly characteristic of our system. Things move to far to the left and the voters are easilly swayed towards the right. Sure, the organization and effectiveness of the right-wing noise machine during the past two decades had an undue influence (especially in the erosion of worker's rights and the primacy of the corporation) but the sentiment that was played on was an unsettling disturbance of heartland values.

Clinton didn't help when he lied about Monica. Although the entire affair was trifling at best, it still perpetuated a perception that Democrats were corrupt after years of ethical problems within the Democratic party. God knows I was no fan of Clinton but oh how I wish he had been honest about what went down with Monica.

What resulted was less "blowback" and more a hard snap to the right - and the country suffered, continues to suffer.

Fortunately, I see the blowback shifting back to the left. If the Dems can't (or won't) take advantage of this, maybe it's time for a strong third party of true progressives. The inertia is with us. The SCLM is beginning to see the entertainment value in the problems of Rove, De Lay, Taft, et al and Dems need to shout louder, jump higher.

Read the polls and fuck conventional wisdom because the tables can be turned in 2006 with some effort and righteous indignation.


Yes, I "blew back". Too much politics on my Daddy blog so I decided to revive this thing. We'll see how it goes.