Wednesday, October 20, 2004

The Awesome God-Like Power of George Bush

We're getting an ad running here in Colorado Springs (home of Focus on the Family and scads of other Fundie nuts), "The Story of Ashley". Basically, Ashley's mom was killed in the WTC attacks and, according to a relative narrating the ad, Ashley became "emotionally withdrawn". I assume that her compassionate conservative family wrote poor Ashley off at this point since the commercial implies that Ashley was lost until this year. But then she was filled with the Holy Spirit or something because now she's gabbing it up on a Bush campaign commercial. It's not clear exactly what happened but the implication is silly.

According to the ad, this year Ashley's family decided to take her to go see George Bush in Ohio. Now, the way the Bush campaign has vetted attendees at its rallies it's obvious Ashley wasn't going there to accuse Bush of dropping the ball on pre-9/11 intelligence or talk about how pissed off she was that Bush hadn't caught Osama bin Laden. Just like everyone else at a Bush rally, she was there to wave a sign, hoot like a hillbilly and boo everytime Kerry's name was mentioned. How Ashley was able to approach Bush without getting body-blocked by Secret Service agents isn't explained in the ad but the narrarator/relative states that Ashley was able to go up to Bush and say, "I lost my mom in 9/11". Bush responds, oh-so-compassionately, "I know that's hard."

Here's where the ad gets maudlin - and absurd. The ad gives us a shot of Bush hugging the girl, looking serious (as serious he can look without scowling) and the narrator claims, "Our president took Ashley in his arms and just embraced her. And it was at that moment that we saw Ashley's eyes fill up with tears."

Ashley cries. Then Ashley speaks (in the ad): "He's the most powerful man in the world and all he wants to do is make sure I'm safe, that I'm OK."

She's cured! Our Preznit is just like Jeebus, he lays his hands on the girl and she's cured! Gawdamighty, have mercy, hal-lay-lew-yah, he's got the power of healing in his hands!

I know this commercial is supposed to show Bush's "human side" (as if his DUI's and AWOL reports couldn't do that) but I would be willing to bet the house that 9 out of 10 holy-rollers will look at this as Dubya having some kind of direct connection to God. I mean, they're already sure he's got the Red Phone routed into heaven but now they have an honest-to-God miracle to prove it. Contact the Pope! We gotta a saint in the making! Ashley was sick and now she's well!

And now I'm sick....


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